📸🎶

Um it was just March, I blinked, and now it's June...? Huh.......?
Thankfully life did manage to slow down a bit during April, but oh sweet baby jesus lordy—the entirety of May was a month-long nonstop sprint. Just running and running, kept going and going and going.

My month of May was characterized by... spraining my ankle, helping fome move to a new apartment, big work projects, 9 day long stressful but amazing business trip with lots of walking on injured ankle, a national tragedy, and then I ended it with a bang by helping volunteer for Fanime our local anime con.

Specifically it's because I have lots of friends involved with either running or performing for the Dance so I signed on to help with A/V and thought I'd try my hand at taking some photos as well!

Honestly I had dreaded this weekend, not for any external reasons other than that I knew I'd be exhausted. 😔 Going from preexisting exhaustion to a highly exhaustive, physically demanding gig with extremely long hours and high social pressure aaah. I wasn't wrong with these predictions; it felt like I was pushing myself to my limits and somewhere in the middle I even cried from fatigue......

(staff vest bright pink,,)

But what I didn't predict was that. I would.. end up.. feeling pretty happy about the entire experience? Despite the lows, it felt... fulfilling? What I'm left with is only.... glowing feelings? Is it Stockholm Syndrome?

This weekend I met a lot of cool people and made new friends—and I didn't expect that that would put me into such a state of giddiness. 🥺 I'm not necessarily the type of person to actively seek out new friends but how can I not be excited about having met and spent time with folks that I got along with well?! And the little community that formed out of all of us working on this event together and supporting each other warms my heart. Attending the shows was fun too since the performers gave tons of energy, bombass remixes, and it's awe-inspiring to see a huge room of people get hyped over their favorite anisong hits haha.

Admittedly I also have to mention that it feels amazing to see people using the photos that I took. Feels like validation that they liked my amateur photos and just being someone who's considered useful/helpful to others is what I live for. It's extra gratifying since taking photos was purely my idea, nobody asked me to do it, yet it ended up becoming something somewhat significant; I feel honored to have been able to contribute like that and help some of the performers be able to immortalize their experience from what sounds like was a meaningful stage for many of them 😭

Plus, I'm not a real photographer so every compliment I've received on my work has meant a whole lot!! There were certainly ups and downs in my photography—especially at the end of each night when I was most tired, the quality suffered—but I want to think that overall I can feel proud of myself. ;u; This may have been my first time experimenting with angles like this too!

Anyway I just wanted to share some of my favorite shots that I managed to take~ I'm not including every artist and it certainly doesn't reflect at all on my opinion on any of them or their incredible performances. 🙏 This is essentially from a photography standpoint.

Regrettably there were four nights of shows, from 6 PM til 2 AM, so unfortunately I just couldn't make it around to capture photos for every performer... And like I said, my work was really inconsistent—most of the shots came out poorly because of the dark room, ever-changing lights and haze, constant movements, my fatigue, sore arms, having to borrow fome's camera for one of the days and being unfamiliar with it, and not having fast enough shutter speed. These are the shots where luck aligned somehow!

Now, you, me, and everything feels like a lie... 🎶 Is it a dream? 💞

So in October, it was announced that my favorite k-pop group Lovelyz would be coming to LA for a concert in November! Somehow, both times they've ever had activities in America have been this year in LA..... and both times, the concerts were announced a cruel mere month prior. ToT Initially I was like, "WHAT I probably shouldn't yolo down to LA again for a concert," for maybe like...10 minutes before it became, "But why not?" As a member of their relatively small western fanbase, I'd definitely regret not being there to support my girls 💪! Y-you can always make money back anyway right? o(-(

Luckily it turned out to be a pretty wallet-friendly trip. ^^ The concert, which also featured JBJ95 and Heize, for whatever reason was free to attend?! I went with my friend Tiffany—who's my only irl Lovelinus friend—and also Myst who was heading to LA for her own playtime, so we made a roadtrip down together and shared a motel. It was a fun little weekend trip with good music, good food, and good friends!

As I mentioned, I've only ever known one person irl who's a Lovelyz fan, aside from Chiisana who likes them but isn't necessarily a Lovelinus. Even given that, Tiffany and I had never actually attended a concert together before. But on this trip I was introduced to two more wonderful friends who are Lovelinuses!!!! It was sooooo much fun and so refreshing to be around them and talk about our girls and for everyone to be on the same page without explanations and just being able to share our excitement and practice fanchants together! 💓

Thanks to these friends kindly waiting in line early—and no monetary restrictions—we were luckily able to have some amazing seats! Honestly so grateful; I owe them my life. The poor folks all the way in the back probably saw nothing as there were no cameras/screens.. But we were able to see the performers' expressions, so therefore they must've been able to see ours too! 🥰

And the moment I realized this...... that Lovelyz could see me, that I was now an existence known to my beloved idols that I'd only ever in these past 5 years been able to admire from afar, that my actions and support might really be felt by them directly, that I had the power to help them feel loved by their fans and give back to how much strength they've given us, that I was truly in that moment a representative of their American fanbase.......... I almost cried while they were performing.

It was a small concert with only 3 acts, but because of that we were treated to a long set with SIX WHOLE SONGS!! 😭 What an amazing experience....

One of the things I love the most about Lovelyz is that their title discography tells a whole story. It's brilliant and it's been so incredible to watch this beautifully thoughtful music project unfold.

Candy Jelly Love --- Crush
Hi~ --- Confession
Ah-Choo --- Friendzoned
Destiny --- Jealousy
WoW! --- Distance
Now, We --- FINALLY A MUTUAL LOVE!!!
Twinkle --- Exploring the relationship
That Day --- Break-up
Lost N Found --- Loneliness
Beautiful Days --- Reminiscence

KCON LA 2019 ✨ Photo Blog

💕💕💕 My fifth year attending KCON and I'm still impressed at how I almost always have a good time as long as the ticket wars don't kill me! This year's lineup included two of my favorite girl groups (IZ*ONE and LOONA) and just overall most things were really fun and reasonably well executed in my opinion! It's still insane that simply at the convention itself—before you even make it to the concerts—you can encounter a ton of idols, listen to their special talks, potentially interact with them. ;u; I find some panels pretty interesting and I really enjoy exploring the expo with all the free beauty and food samples and loads of unbelievably delicious sales!! It's just become a no-brainer for me to go every year LOL.

Artists that we saw this year!!!

💘 Owns my soul probably: IZ*ONE, LOONA

💕 Love~: fromis_9, SF9

🌸 Like: NU'EST, Mamamoo, Itzy, Seventeen

👌 I guess I like?: N.Flying, AB6IX

🔍 Interested in learning more: ATEEZ, Stray Kids

😊 Neutral: Momoland, Verivery

Just like me, this post is long and messy—sorry, not sorry.

Anime Expo '18

It's been years since I've written a post like this, but I'm gonna give it a shot! As my memory gets worse and worse, I feel like write-ups will be really helpful and yet also terribly difficult to compose since I've already forgotten what I did on this trip...... And I got back...3 hours ago.

Overall, this was a good AX that went fairly smoothly! Yay it wasn't a mess!!!

Admittedly I'm extremely spoiled/a bit numb because I'm privileged enough to be surrounded by my youtaite friends in my everyday life and it was also my 7th time (WTF IT DOESN'T FEEL LIKE IT) going to AX so I don't necessarily get super excited about everything or get post-con depression anymore..... I'm truly happy for how this event has impacted others—people's tweets are so, sooo cute ;;;—but is it weird to say that I feel almost left out because I don't feel as emotional about it as others do anymore?? Regardless, AX is still one of the most special things to me each year! It's strange but I simultaneously feel like I was more social than ever this year, yet also didn't socialize as much as I feel I should have—but I'll elaborate later. ;o;

This time, my hotel arrangement ended up being 10 people split between two rooms that we were luckily able to get next to each other. My room was with Chiisana, Hinoe, Sophie/Kuroko, and Diji; and the other room was Fome, Myst, Chris/Hakuro, Toast, and Lisa. They're all friends that I've already hung out with a lot (everyone was NorCal other than Hinoe) and was pretty comfortable with, so that went super well!

B1A4 Concert!!

(Not so much a fan account, but more about my personal experience!)

Yesterday was B1A4's concert was in San Francisco ^o^ Myst and I both went as VIP so got to be in the front pit and participate in the hi touch (high five) event!!!

Honestly, I think the concert was the most unreserved fun I've had in a long time. Which is both a testament to how great of a concert it was and how little fun I have in my life.

The boys put on impressive performances, delivering solid dancing and singing (esp Sandeul belting my god!!!!) with incredible endurance. ;u; They were visibly tired but kept going and delivering and were full of energy til the end! But I think what was really special was that they put a lot of care into making sure that the audience had a fun, engaged experience. We weren't just watching them perform; we were constantly interacting and encouraged to respond. For most of the concert, it was a lot of asking us to sing along, scream, put our hands up, wave and pump our arms, jump while they were performing.

Then what confused me was when we got to a song that didn't include much of them singing or dancing? It was.....intense clubby music? The boys were all jumping and hyping us up, and we were all jumping too, AND THEN THEY STARTED EMPTYING THEIR WATER BOTTLES....ONTO THE AUDIENCE. Water! spraying! everywhere!!! It felt like a rave?! (We found out afterwards that it was a song remixed by Jinyoung LOLLLLL)

At that point, it was no longer just a B1A4 performance—it was B1A4 members constructing an environment in which we fans could let loose and have a good time! I really think that they didn't want any of us to just stand or sit idly, didn't want us to just be absorbed in taking pics/videos on our phones, didn't want us to just be observers. I appreciated that a lot ^^

I don't really ever get (or pursue) opportunities to just let go and let my body move and just have unreserved fun... I refuse to dance because I'm bad at it and I don't like how my awkward body looks when moving around, and I just get consumed by self-consciousness and the judging eyes of other people. The dance floor is place of anxiety for my party-poopin' ass.
But at the concert, I felt...safe? An unfamiliar feeling of few inhibitions and not needing to care about what I looked like or what anyone thought of me. All I had to do was jump and wave my arms, all I had to respond to was the beat of the music, and the entire audience was in it together to show our support for B1A4 who wanted to give back to us ;A; It was a great stress relief HAHA.

During their encore, they came out with crates of water bottles and WENT HAM. "San Francisco, are you tired?!?! Are you ready to shower?????!!?!?!!" were the words they'd fill the room with before repeating the chorus of Good Timing over.. and over.. and over.. and DRENCHING us with water and love LOL. Objectively, I know they went overboard and probably shouldn't have, but... I ultimately didn't have any problem with it and just enjoyed it. ;v;! At first, I did my best to avoid the water because of protective reflex—I'd flinch and duck, cover my face, and clean off my glasses as soon as I could. But then I zoned out for a moment and thought about it......... and concluded that I didn't have any reason to avoid the water? Unlike many fans in the front, I didn't have my phone out trying to get recordings. I didn't have a face full of make-up to worry about. My hair doesn't get frizzy. All of my belongings were covered because I was expecting rain. I wasn't sick, wasn't feeling cold. Why be afraid?

So from then on, I kept my head up and just smiled and laughed like what B1A4 would probably have wanted to see from us. Was so soaked!!! It's such a small change, but I was very happy and proud that I chose to let go and embrace the fun, messy, in-the-moment thing, instead of clinging to the pragmatic route as I always do. In the end, I had no personal qualms about the downpour and surprised myself by how much I enjoyed it. ;U;

Oh and they just absolutely spoil us with fanservice. <3 It warms my heart remembering all of their sincere gestures, and how they were constantly waving to fans all over the venue, giving us endless finger hearts, making eye contact if possible (I swear I made eye contact with CNU for a moment), posing with fans' banners and headbands, reminding us that we were loved and appreciated. This is the kind of memory that's going to make me smile each time it crosses my mind.

Here's B1A4's newest song, A Lie, composed by leader and my bias Jinyoung~ On first listen, I was rather lukewarm, but it consistently grew on me and now I'M SO EMOTIONAL OVER THIS SONG. (If you're new to their music, their songs tend to land on very opposite sides of the melancholic-silly spectrum haha. Solo Day is a jam!)

KCON LA 2016

Oh my god KCON this year was such a mess. I loved it soooo much last year that I pledged to try to go again in all coming years even if it was expensive, and THIS YEAR LET ME DOWN SO HARD. From as early as the stupid unfair ticket sale process (only a few of the sections were available to buy from?? AND they put you in a random place in line, not first-come-first serve), it was mostly stupid all the way through. Stupid needlessly long lines in which I spent most of my KCON waiting. Stupid things that were not clear or written wrongly or not written at all or not well thought-through or "I can't help you; go wait in that line instead," "I can't help you; you'll have to wait for my supervisor." So! many! things! went wrong! STUPID AS FUCK lack of screens during the concerts so unless you spent a shitload of money and were lucky enough to get the good tickets, you couldn't see anything! I've never been to a concert before that didn't have big screens so that people in the back could see. Who does that?! Fucking KCON!

Yo look at this panorama from the night I had better seats and see if you can spot the only screens.

But positive points!
I continue to adore all of the K-beauty access and information at the convention. Last year, Charlotte Cho (Sokoglam) and beautifymeeh's panel basically changed my life forever!!!! It taught me most of the things I know about skincare! I've been hooked on Korean skincare since, dedicated myself to a nightly skin routine, and it smoothed out my skin. *___* Plus all the products are well packaged and there's such a variety and it's pretty fun to be into LOL.

This year, my favorite panel was Aritaum's—I learned a lot about how to apply different products and the research behind the products, and the reps were so sweet! ;v; Chiisana and I visited their booth and one of the reps offered to give Chiisa a mini-makeover to test which BB cushion is her color. They used the same products demonstrated at the panel, and her skin looked better than ever, so I was persuaded to buy the Iope Bio Hydro Cream since I have dry skin ehe.. (And it came with nice free samples for expensive things *A*) So far, it's made my face look pretty moisturized!

I actually really liked how my skin looked on this day! I used the tips I learned from the panel kekeke

My favorite Aritaum product continues to be the Water Sliding Lip Tint though. It's the only Aritaum product Chiisa and I owned before this week, but it's both of our current favorite lip products, something we literally use everyday, and the only reason we decided to attend the panel LOL. It's seriously an awesome lip tint and it puzzles me as to why I never hear about it!!! We learned about and bought them for the first time in a store that was having a BOGO deal, so they were like $4.50 each or something. And this year we went back to that store just to get them again (although ours from last year haven't run out yet still!).

Anyway, all of the cosmetics promoters at the con were so very generous! Chiisa and I spent most of our [limited] convention time in the "Beauty Block" section of the expo hall. Most of the booths had giveaways so we participated in a handful of them, and sometimes the sponsors would go through everyone in line and give a free mask as a thank you for waiting!! Even with how little time we got to spend at the convention and not in lines, we've accumulated a good amount of free Korean skincare products LMAO.

ALL THE AWESOME FREE K-BEAUTY PRODUCTS I GOT WAAAAA

Another positive point was the cool concert line-up. I think the performances overall were pretty good but it was damn hard to tell when I couldn't see much. The energy was there though! It was still fun even though I was annoyed.

[Fan Account] Apink Concert in San Francisco

Today I had the honor of attending Apink's concert in San Francisco for their North American tour, Pink MEMORY!! ^^ I'm exhausted now, but I had a blast at the show.

I'll be posting all about the experience I had~
There may be some "well, duh" things though because I went in not having read about anything from previous legs of the tour, and I also haven't watched all of Apink's shows so I'm not an expert on their personalities?

KCON LA 2015!

I just went to my first KCON! And now I wonder why I've never gone to KCON before because holy shit, it is such an unforgettable experience. I went with Chiisana and our friend Dres, and the funny thing is that Chiisa and I are known for having very bad luck—especially together. The drive from Norcal to LA is supposed to take 6-7 hours, but guess who had to endure a 10 hour drive through traffic hell with a lovely view of mountain wildfires.... ;x;
And somehow, KCON itself went .. beyond smoothly for us. In fact, it went super well!

So here's my KCON experience complete with shaky pictures and scream-ridden fancams ^^

LA K-Pop Festival

This past weekend was #TeamSiliconValley's roadtrip adventure to SoCal! We hung out around Arcadia and Irvine, but the main attraction was the LA K-Pop Festival Concert celebrating the 111th anniversary of Korean-American immigration. :> The concert--okay, the entire trip--was lots of fun!

The line-up at the concert was: CNBlue, INFINITE, SHINee, SISTAR, 2PM, Girl's Day, Lena Park, Kim Taewoo, Baek Jiyoung, Song Sohee, Seol Woondo

Suuuuch a good line-up, and especially for a FREE concert! I feel like beneath the SNSD level of sunbae supremacy, the next tier of the bests includes CNBlue, INFINITE, and SISTAR. (SHINee and 2PM arguably but they're slightly more sunbae status.) I mean, they have the talent, looks, popularity, stage charisma, personality, good music, and the formulas for fame and longevity in the industry. ^^

I must admit that I had some expectations (heh) for Girl's Day whereas I didn't think much of 2PM, for some reason. It had always stuck with me that 2PM only has one really, really strong capable vocalist and that the group is more dance-oriented. (I kind of forget that Wooyoung and Junho are pretty good singers.) BUT WOW this reversal--Girl's Day's performances fell short for me while 2PM exceeded anything I could've asked for. It conveniently slipped my mind that half of Girl's Day doesn't really..sing.. and while Minah is amazing, it didn't feel like she was at her best and it's difficult to carry an entire group by your lonesome.

But holy shit 2PM why did I ever doubt you? My respect for them has increased tenfold, and while they're not my favorite group, they may have been my favorite act. Everyone held their own and it didn't feel like there were weak links. They delivered such an incredible, solid performance and most importantly: they brought boundless energy and enjoyably engaged in audience interaction. They reeked of confidence and it really seemed like they cared about making sure their fans had a good time. It really helps that they were the only group that had a clubby sound HAHAHA. I liked Hands Up but I never knew how much I FREAKING LOVE HANDS UP. Dancing and cheering along to that song was probably the highlight of the concert for me; the performers and audience alike were immersed in the music, company, and atmosphere. :D



SHINee and INFINITE were fantastic, surprising nobody. They are the current kings of live performances, after all. They're always perfect vocally and in their choreography, ever so in sync and powerful.

I didn't know how much I liked SISTAR until this concert. I didn't know I liked the song Loving U. I also didn't know that I liked Soyu this much--I found her serviceable due to her soft but decently solid voice, but homegurl can also belt and that versatility is respectable. Go Soyu.

CNBlue delivered the other high points of the concert for me. HONESTLY IDK if I would've made the trip for the concert had CNBlue not come. I like them. I like Yonghwa. I like all of them. I like their music. They're amazing performers and it's a shame that their overall ability is hard to gauge when they have no choice but to strum-sync to the music track for most performances. So really, Minhyuk and Jungshin are there to look pretty--EXCEPT THEY ONLY SHOWED ONE SHOT OF MINHYUK ON THE SCREEN so I was sad. :'( The songs they performed were very Yonghwa-centric so it was a shame that Jonghyun really had to step back. BUT YONGHWA WAS WONDERFUL AND GODLY AND. He sounds so good live, falsetto in perfect control and all<3 God dammit Yonghwa, who said you could be a charming MC and then show up on a white piano and sing with the ring of the heavens and then sling a guitar over your shoulder and all the while having a very nice face. How dare you? And he blew so. many. kisses at the audience?! SUCH FANSERVICE. I also enjoyed Love Love Love which was another crowd engager.

One thing I was pleased with was the amount of collabs. ^^ When Baek Jiyoung stepped out, my first thought was, "Oh hey, Taecyeon's here too... Maybe you two should..WINKWINK...." and then they did actually perform their duet, My Ear's Candy! The SHINee-INFINITE duo Toheart performed as well, and they were pretty impressive. Or well, Key was impressive. I always knew Woohyun was an awesome singer. AND THE 2PM-SISTAR COLLAB<3 It was what caught me off guard the most. Wooyoung, Soyu, Jun.K, and Hyorin sang If I Ain't Got You as pairs, which was sweet. They were all great! I remember going starry-eyed because Hyorin and Jun.K--both representative main vocalists--were singing together. It's like another Taeyeon-Jonghyun duo hehe.

There were plenty of flaws in the organizing/management and even down to the camerawork, but I guess I have to remember that it is a free concert. Free. But still, isn't it common broadcasting knowledge to not drastically change your shot when your camera's hot and LIVE FOR TENS OF THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE who are depending on watching the concert through the tiny screens because the stage is even tinier?

Yano's and my original seats were in row 89, aka the 5th row from the top of the coliseum LOLOL. Birds flew by and almost seemed in arm's reach (okay, total exaggeration). It's all really fascinating until your fear of heights is triggered!!

I SERIOUSLY regret not knowing about the glowsticks though. If I had one, I would've waved it for the entire concert to show my support. ;^; I mean, we're all just little dots to the performers, but at least you make a bit of a difference if you're a glowing dot...!!