Late night rambling #12

Help, it's 3 AM and I wish I didn't have to sleep. I had the thought while brushing my teeth that I've been becoming more and more similar to the kinds of people that I used to not get along with.. In fact, I found them a little scary and/or annoying--probably out of envy tbh because I was an awkward dumb shit. :< It's not necessarily a bad thing I think, but it almost makes me feel like...I've betrayed myself or something LOL.....

I don't want to be an insincere person, but I wonder if trying too hard to be sincere makes me insincere? Is it insincere to sometimes wear a mask of positivity, when it stems from sincere intentions of wanting to be a more positive person? Kind of an interesting and incomplete thought that I should probably expand on WHEN I'M NOT LATE NIGHT SHIT RAMBLING like a drunk person. I swear tired Eva is more like a drunk than inebriated Eva. Inebriated Eva is coherent and doesn't type shit to her blog on her ipad while in bed. I watched a show where a character used the word shit like 12 times in 2 sentences so I feel better about how many times I've repeated it in this post. Holy cats I'm going to hate waking up tomorrow morning so much. Did you know it was apparently national puppy day? Have I ever mentioned dogs are my favorite animal. The more ya know.

Forget that this post exists when tomorrow comes please.