"Now I'm feeling super hyped because I intend to have a productive winter break! I'll be increasing my work hours, but I'll try to find the time nevertheless. There's a lot I want to do! And I'm going to try chasing after some opportunities! I'm gonna have some fun while at it. I'll do my best. I want to become a more impressive version of myself. I can do it. :)"
Uh, who hacked my account because I don't recognize this person LOL.....
Y'know, at the end of the day, I'm pretty glad that I blog, and get to chronicle my ups and downs and beliefs and griefs. ^^;; What stronger motivational voice than your own?
Last night I ended up staying up late rereading my blog posts.. through my new years resolution review.. til the semester of Fall 2014. It's interesting when you feel like you're reading the words of a completely different person.
Man, one year ago, I was on top of the world. I wasn't as learned as now, nor was I even as able to socialize as much as now, but because I felt confident in myself and my potential, I was happy. D: Because I was trying new things and surprisingly liked it, I wanted to try more new things.
What happened in my last semester of college that stomped on my confidence and courage..? ;;; How did I gradually become more and more unmotivated, and started finding less and less meaning in everything... :c sigh
I kind of want to find that person again. That kind of thought itself is a good sign!!
;u; Today I already feel like I'm bouncing back a bit, from the moment I woke up and my first thought wasn't, "Fuck I hate everything why do I have to get out of bed when there's no point."
And a few days ago! I started practicing keyboard again despite not having touched it in probably 6 years. ;A; I'm shocked~
Then yesterday! I cleaned up and finally put away all the shit I failed to unpack from .. AX in July.. and my Alaska cruise trip in May.....
Now today! I spent all evening working on this year's AX vlog which I haven't touched since a few days after AX. :'D Slowly kind of picking stuff up again. Little steps, but I think it's okay to be proud of them.
Last night I ended up staying up late rereading my blog posts.. through my new years resolution review.. til the semester of Fall 2014. It's interesting when you feel like you're reading the words of a completely different person.
Man, one year ago, I was on top of the world. I wasn't as learned as now, nor was I even as able to socialize as much as now, but because I felt confident in myself and my potential, I was happy. D: Because I was trying new things and surprisingly liked it, I wanted to try more new things.
What happened in my last semester of college that stomped on my confidence and courage..? ;;; How did I gradually become more and more unmotivated, and started finding less and less meaning in everything... :c sigh
I kind of want to find that person again. That kind of thought itself is a good sign!!
;u; Today I already feel like I'm bouncing back a bit, from the moment I woke up and my first thought wasn't, "Fuck I hate everything why do I have to get out of bed when there's no point."
And a few days ago! I started practicing keyboard again despite not having touched it in probably 6 years. ;A; I'm shocked~
Then yesterday! I cleaned up and finally put away all the shit I failed to unpack from .. AX in July.. and my Alaska cruise trip in May.....
Now today! I spent all evening working on this year's AX vlog which I haven't touched since a few days after AX. :'D Slowly kind of picking stuff up again. Little steps, but I think it's okay to be proud of them.
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